Saturday, July 15, 2006

Okay, starting properly...

Hello and welcome, gentle reader, to the first (proper) post on this most monumental of internet-based weblogs. I hope it will fill with wisdom and wit, but chances are it will consist of 90% lies and trickery and 10% bad jokes.

This is impressively hard to write - being all proper and serious and whatnot. I already have an LJ, but that is reserved for swearing a lot and TALKING IN ALL CAPITALS IN AN IMPRESSIVE SATIRE ON INTERNET ETIQUETTE. In other news, I have recently discovered that it's quite hard to spell "etiquette" correctly when you're typing it all in capital letters.

So since this is a "serious" blog, without emoticons or anything (see how long that lasts...) I guess I should say something thoughtful. I'm tempted to talk about Israel's current "Hey, let's blow up everything!" attitude, but to be honest I haven't been following the situtation closely enough to actually know what's really going on. Apparently there were wrongdoings and shenanigans? One thought I would like to elaborate on (read: one opinion I am going to bullishly thrust into your face) is the Grand Prix. Or Prixes. Or whatever the plural is (Prii?).

It frankly astonishes me that everyone is running around screeching "Global warming! Global warming!" and no-one has stopped for a moment and said "Wait a minute...these races we have in cars and on bikes where they go around and around and around in a circle and waste lots of we really need seventeen million of them?"

In my lifetime I think I have met two people who avidly follow F1 racing. Avidly that is, not just tuning in on Sundays because ITV's showing it and they can't be bothered to find the Sky remote. So do we really need so many? There are how many different Grand Prix(es)? European? Japanese? Australian? Liverpudlian? And how many races do each have - fifteen, isn't it? What a monumentally wasteful concept. You only need a few per contest! Heck, you only need one, but I'd be happy to compromise - three, say. Sorted. The viewers' ratings shoot up because that's few enough to snag the casual watchers, and how much oil is saved? How many emissions are reduced? Not to mention the massive savings to the manufacturers - don't they have to spend a couple million every time one of these things blows a gasket? (Incidentally, what is a gasket? Does it really exist?) So there you go. Cut back and East Anglia stays above water for a few more years. And I haven't even mentioned NASCAR, Monte Carlo, Manx TT, um, Robot Wars...

We're the Planeteers, you can be one too, 'cos saving our planet is the thing to do.

1 comment:

TeamSmithy said...

But if there was no motor sports there would be no Pixar's Cars, and I for one am willing to sacrifice Gaia if it means I get to see Owen Wilson play a CGI NASCAR racer called Lightning McQueen.