Dear ITV, I have an idea to help get you some more viewers. It is a spin-off of The X Factor, called The D Factor. Basically it is almost exactly like its parent show, except the "wannabe hopefuls" or whatever they are called are only allowed to sing Decemberists songs.
This would work because a) it would be hilarious and b) I would watch it, so you're guaranteed a whole extra viewer. I feel the concept of a wild-eyed seventeen-year-old girl singing the entirety of "The Mariner's Revenge Song" in the time-honoured overblown-Mariah-Carey-style, caught in the glow of ten million lights, sweat trickling on her brow as Simon Cowell, Thingy and Whatsit furrow their brows and say, "Hmm", is one that quite frankly you owe humanity.
On a completely unrelated note, does anyone know if the "http" actually stands for anything?